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And a new novel is out by self-published romance maven and online best-seller D'Ancey LaGuarde. A Hill To Call My Own is the 33rd in LaGuarde's ground-breaking new year's epic, A Home Among The Hills, which follows the generations of the Hills family through troubled times, romance, and supernatural thrills. Katrina is the feckless freckled bare-foot red-headed whimsical heir to the Hills family gift: the gift of being able to see her fated mate in a mug of soup on her 18th birthday. But the mate she sees in her mug looks like a piece of landscape, and Katrina dismisses her family foresight as a piece of foolish superstition: plans [sic] instead to never marry.

But Derazander [sp?] is a wanted viscount with the face of a wastrel, a thin elegant moustache, and a dark secret. By day he's the toast of the town: half-warrior, half-aristocrat, all-man. By night he's the same, but by the light of the moon he turns into a moderately sized but elegantly contoured parkland. Half-man, half-hill, he's the unexpected offspring of a woman cursed by her ex-lover: the earth spirit of a local hillock.

When Katrina, wandering barefoot onto her neighbouring estate while refusing to attend her curtsying lesson, is chased by a gang of wild dogs into a tree, she finds herself fainting up the handsome tree as the full moon rises. But she awakens in the warm arms of a stranger and her heart is lost. Deraxander is drawn to the passionate bosom and earth-stained feet of Katrina Hills but cannot commit to anything but a few desperate smooches and some light fingering until he has broken his family curse.

And the local council has just given permission for a railroad that will run right through the groin of his ancestral lands. Can Katrina overcome her free spirit enough to negotiate local council by-laws to save her lover's elegant topography? Can Deraxander find it in himself to be the man she needs him to be, and not the parkland his cursed blood demands?

With a sweeping cameo by the benevolent Isambard Kingdom Brunel, and a passionate dissertation into the influence of Capability Brown on English hillscape gardening, A Hill To Call My Own is a classic for the ages.

The Times called it "...upsettingly erotic."

Wired called it "...more focused on irrigation than I expected"

The Guardian called it "Possibly problematic, but we can't put our finger on why."

A Hill To Call My Own is available now in all compost bins and socially distanced bookstores.